So…have you ever made cookies and put them in the oven w/o preheating? Was it ready when the package said they would be? Probably needed more time right? Yeah, I thought so. Well our bodies are like ovens. MOST of us need to “pre-heat” before we can be used…so to speak.
    Foreplay plays a big part in sex and, often times, it is the most fun. The kissing, touching, licking, sucking, fondling and all of the sensual attention matters. Role playing, game playing and the use of props, toys, oils and tasty toppings are just a few ideas that could be used. Subtle things could help too. Massages, baths and the likes could get the blood going as well.
    Food is actually a good place to start and at times it can minimize the amount of time spent on foreplay because it causes natural arousal and sexual desire. I am talking about aphrodisiacs. According to Libido Increasing Foods, “Certain foods can, in addition to being healthy, have a direct effect on your sexual activity due to the effect that they have on stress levels, energy levels, chemical activity within the brain and also how they affect your hormones. It is even possible for some foods to literally increase blood flow to your genitalia!”
    There are actually quite a few foods that are considered aphrodisiacs:

Chocolate-  (natural chocolate, no additives) contains anandamide, a chemical that gives you a natural, psychoactive good feeling. Also contains phenylethylamine which releases dopamine in the brain's pleasure centers, peaking during an orgasm. It induces feelings of excitement and stimulates euphoria and attraction.
Oysters- The most known and common aphrodisiac, oysters have high levels of zinc which increases the production and release of testosterone leading to a higher sex drive and an increased libido.
Honey- A natural aphrodisiac that has various B vitamins and boron, causes a sex drive and orgasms in men and women.
Bananas- Filled with B vitamins, potassium and magnesium, bananas deliver a boost to your libido.
Basil- Some people say the smell of this herb is the actual aphrodisiac, while others believe the taste stimulates sexual desire and increases your heart rate. Increased heart rate leads to an increased flow of blood leading to a quicker arousal.
Champagne-Hitting the bloodstream quickly, champagne warmly intoxicates the body and actually has an aroma similar to a female’s pheromones. Those are the chemicals that act outside of her body that attracts and affects the receiving person.

    Other foods that are considered aphrodisiacs are almonds, asparagus, avocados, figs, garlic, pomegranates, red wine, salmon, vanilla, walnuts, and (believe it or not)watermelon.
    The reason why I am bringing up the issue of foreplay and aphrodisiacs is because not everyone is into foreplay, but experience some difficulty in getting sex started or maintaining it. First off, let me mention that ladies love to be chased, approached and sought after. It makes them feel wanted and sexy. Well ladies, the men feel the same way. Sometimes, they don’t want to be the one to initiate sex and find it pleasing to have a woman take control or get it started. For those on either side who aren’t used to it, simple foreplay or a nice dinner/dessert can help push you in the right direction. Some foods that you can find on these sites make your nerve endings more sensitive, meaning when you are touched, kissed, licked, sucked and whatever else, you WILL have a spot and you will love it! Be open to trying new things and having fun! And don’t just show, tell!

                                                                                                                                                                           Happy Sexing!
                                                                                                                                                                                      SP


***The pictures were borrowed from https://itunes.apple.com/ee/app/natural-aphrodisiacs/id373077943?mt=8 and http://altlibrary.com/tag/aphrodisiacs/ respectively. Please click on the photos to be redirected to these sites. For more information on aphrodisiac foods, you can visit the following sites:
http://www.libido-increasing-food.com/aphrodisiac-foods.php
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/08/aphrodisiac-foods_n_1263124.html#s671690&title=Oysters
http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/tips-moves/aphrodisiac-foods-0509#slide-1

        It seems like summer is quickly approaching. For some people, this is the time to drop the baggage and just chill solo. For others, this may be the time where they are looking for a new piece of luggage to take along on their summer expedition. Either way, you need to know where you can find new luggage or the perfect place to fly solo with an occasional friend. I have just what you are looking for. The best places to look for the summer!
        I had a friend ask me “how do you know which guy at the club is the right one to get serious with?” Ok, so in case others are a little stuck in this area as well, let me help you out. Do not have intentions on being serious with anyone you meet at the club. I am not saying that it cannot happen, just don’t expect it to happen. The club or a party is a place to go to chill and hang out with your friends in an energized environment where you can, hopefully, forget about your worries for the night. It is not where you go to make your next move in life. For that reason, clubs and parties are the perfect place to scout for your one-night or summer fling. Let’s also add the beach, bars, or out of state/town trips (this really depends on how the two of you handle it. You can make it more if that’s the intentions) to this list.

        If you are looking for something that may happen to be a little more serious or steady, then try slightly social places or somewhere where there is an opportunity to have a longer conversation like a barbeque or friendly function like a birthday party or something thrown at the house where there is space and opportunity. You can also do this at the grocery store, mall, when you go out to eat, church (hallelujah!), walking around downtown, the gym, the coffee shop or deli and even just hanging out on your porch and someone happens to pass by. There needs to be an inviting environment that doesn’t feel rushed or like a conversation cannot take place at that time.  The movies, bowling, an arcade/game room place are other locations where you can meet someone.
        To be honest, you can meet people almost anywhere where the intentions can be almost anything. It all depends on what you want, what you are looking for and the communication between you and the person you spy. Just keep an eye out for children by their side, wedding rings, wedding ring tans, what’s in the shopping cart and who’s tagging along with them. This could be an indication of what you are about to get into, what you can expect and may lead to some questions you want to ask before you propose anything.
Best of Luck!

                                                                                                                                                           Sincerely,
                                                                                                                                                                     SP

***These photos were borrowed from http://sadinne.thoughts.com/posts/its-friday and http://tlc.howstuffworks.com/family/how-often-shop-for-groceries.htm respectively. Please click on the photos to be redirected to those sites.

        We all have spoken and unspoken, written and unwritten rules of our lives. For relationship purposes, it’s simply called the code (code of ethics and logic for that matter). We have rules for if we see someone we both like, how do we decide who gets to talk to them?  If you hear someone talking about your friend, what is your next move? Your mans get into a fight, do you jump too? I’m sure you all just answered these questions with little to no problem, but what do you do if you are crushing on someone your friend used to deal with? Do you take your shot or not play the game?
        I think the answer depends on whose code we are talking about. In my experience, guys and girls handle this differently. For guys, the general rule seems to be if your friend wasn’t in love with the chick or didn’t have feelings then she is free bait. Don’t quote me on this. 1) I am not a man. 2) some men are a little more in their feelings than others. You can’t share everyone with the team. For ladies, at least in my case, you do not talk to your friends ex-anything. It is usually a turn-off that your friend has already dealt with them. Although this should be the standard rule, there may be a little wiggle room depending on the person.
        If you really can’t seem to pull yourself from this person, approach your friend about it. Let them know you are feeling someone from their past and wanted to know if it was cool if you took it there with them. If your friend was ever in love with this person or you know they had deep feelings for them, just go ahead and cut your losses because there is no way in hell that this would be acceptable.
        If you are not sure how your friend will react or you guys haven’t really talked about what the code is, now is probably a good time to make sure you guys are all on the same page. There are so many friendships that have been broken and lost all because someone broke the code. Don’t let that be you. Adhere to the code man!

                                                                                                                                                                Sincerely,

                                                                                                                                                                                SP




*** This photo was borrowed from http://www.123rf.com/photo_2731155_a-magnifying-glass-zooming-in-on-the-word-code-in-red-surrounded-by-zeros-and-ones-of-the-binary-pag.html . Please click on the photo to be redirected.