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Lovers and Friend Zones

7/25/2014

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        The more you get to know a person, the more intrigued you become, granted that you like what you are finding out. You want to know more, spend more time with them and talking to them. Similarities and commonalities bring you two closer together and this person can potentially be a lover…unless they have already placed you in the friend zone.

PictureI Wish You'd Love Me by: Tynisha Keli
        Ugh, those God awful words. This zone is almost worse than the no sex zone. At least with the no sex zone you may have hope that one day he or she may bust it wide open, but that friend zone! Man, it makes you lose all hope. But should all hope be lost? How do you escape the zone and transition from friends to lovers?

        Now, I don’t want to get you all excited. There is a 50/50 chance that you can successfully leave the friend zone. Some people will not budge, but others may be secretly feeling you right back. Start by becoming a little softer. Switch up the conversation and your voice tone. You may even want to talk to them more. Begin to flirt. You can start subtly by laughing at all jokes (even the ones that you usually just give them a blank stare for) and touch them when you talk or laugh. I’m sure that you guys spend time together, but try moving things to public places and make it a date for just you two, no other friends. Go to places like a ice cream parlor or snack shop and a legit restaurant to eat and chill, not the corner spot, drive-through or walk-up. I’m sure all of this sounds familiar. These are things you would do when you are courting. That’s basically what you have to do in this situation.

        One last thing you should do before coming out and confessing your undying love for your boo-friend is out right, bold and blunt flirting. I don’t suggest being an ass about it, but eliminate all room for suspension and make it obvious that you are feeling them as more than a friend. This can be in person or the phone. If you don’t get put in your place with the “bff you’re so crazy,” or “friend, don’t play like that,” or any other indication that you have definitely jumped the fence and need to head back into the friend zone, then move forward and tell boo-friend, “I got a thing for you baby you know.” In the instance that you have to go back across the fence, you have to decide if you can accept just the friendship or if it’s time to move on. And for you horrible, horrible people with so much power, let them down easy. If you feel a friend is doing too much and taking it too far, be upfront and let them know how you feel about the situation. Tell Rodger to go home!

        Some people fear that being more than friends can jeopardize a friendship. I believe in the quote by Ella Wheeler Wilcox  that “All love that has not friendship for its base, is like a mansion built upon the sand.” Every great relationship is built upon friendship so there is a good chance of having a successful relationship. In the event that it does not work out, it only means that you two are better as friends and with a friendship as strong as what you two have, going back to a platonic relationship shouldn’t be a hard thing to do.

                                                                                                                                                                      

                                                                                                                                May the Odds be Ever in Your Favor,
                                                                                                                                                                                SP


****The first photo was borrowed from http://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_ssc=1&_nkw=BEST+FRIENDS+FOREVER&_dcat=155101 . Please click on the photo to be redirected to the site. Rights to the songs/videos do not belong to me. Please click on the hyperlink and photo to view the music videos.
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    I am a journalist with a passion for writing and helping others. Views expressed are solely mine unless other wised mentioned. They are my opinions and are not always facts.
    S.P-Smudge Proof


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