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It's Not You, It's Me...

12/3/2014

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       You know, I love the holidays. When I was younger, aside from the gifts, my favorite part about the holidays was the decorations. You like decorations too, I’m sure. So, let’s say that you like ornaments in particular. Out of all the ornaments, the different shapes and colors, you seem to always be drawn to the circle ones.  It’s just something about them. Every year, you put them up, they fall, break or tarnish, and every year, you buy more of the same ornaments. Stay with me. Have you ever thought about buying different ornaments? All ornaments aren’t the same. Neither are people. You keep dating the same type of people, something goes wrong, and you find yourself dating the same type of people again only to say that all men/women are the same. When ole faithful falls through, it’s time to try something new (hey, that rhymed!)


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We’ve all said it, I’ll admit that I once had this belief as well. We’ve all thought at one time or another that all men or women are the same. Every man or woman has even argued that they are different. No, their argument wasn’t a lie, but just exactly what are you looking for when you select your prospects? We want someone loyal, respectful, understanding, dependable, humorous, honest and so forth. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but how many of us actually find all of that? You may find someone who is attractive (shouldn’t be the TOP priority FYI), funny and dependable, but you let them slide on the other characters you are looking for. You say you want someone who has goals and is going somewhere in life, yet you always find yourself with a wanna be thug with dreams of owning the block or a chick whose ultimate dream is to own a weave line. You get with either of the two only to find out that their dream is just that or is something so far from realistic that it can only come true in a dream. No shade to anybody, but what are you getting? You don’t want to date a cheater, but you take one back. You don’t want to date anyone who is disrespectful, but allow him to call you a bitch or you see the level of respect given to the females in their life is not up to your standards and you stay. Hold up, I’m not through. You say you want a lady with class, but every chance she gets, she’s in somebody’s club shaking her tail in an outfit that barely covered it in the first place. You want someone who gives you attention, but end up with someone who’d rather chill with their friends than you. You choose a person who spends carelessly, but want a person who can budget and help build a future you both aspire to have.

The saying is finally true, “it’s not you, it’s me.” You damn right it’s you. Stop dating the same type of person expecting different results. It’s not going to happen. Don’t settle and don’t budge. Try something new and see what results you get. I’m not saying you have to be pretentious and have these incredibly high standards. No, I am saying that you either need to switch things up or stop lowering your value, or both! There are so many varieties of people to date in the world, don’t get comfortable with just one when that one isn’t working out. Ask Santa for something different this Christmas and see how that sets off your new year.





                                                                                                                                                            Happy Holidays,
                                                                                                                                                                           SP


****These photos were borrowed from http://blog.a-b-c.com/2013/01/03/does-your-recruiting-message-stand-out-in-a-crowd and http://imagesearch.co/464211/christmas-ornaments-wallpaper-13338.html. respectively. Please click on the photos to be redirected to the sites.
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    I am a journalist with a passion for writing and helping others. Views expressed are solely mine unless other wised mentioned. They are my opinions and are not always facts.
    S.P-Smudge Proof


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